Some people are natural planners, and love the excitement of planning a special event – even one as huge and all-important as their wedding day. But unfortunately, this isn’t true of all of us – and it can be uncomfortable to realise you don't enjoy planning your own wedding. People tend to feel stressed and overwhelmed as the big day approaches, and many people simply hate the planning process.
But this doesn’t necessarily mean that you aren’t looking forward to getting married, or that you aren’t ready to tie the knot. There are many reasons people hate wedding planning – yes, it's completely normal! – and there are many ways to make it morae enjoyable or tolerable. Is wedding planning the most fun part of your life right now? If not, don't worry. You are normal!
Here are some reasons people hate wedding planning, along with some ideas to make it easier for you.
Why Do I Hate Wedding Planning?
There are so many reasons why some people simply don’t vibe with wedding planning. Most of the time, it’s because they’re prone to anxiety or because their lives are so busy that it doesn’t seem to fit in anywhere.
It's Busy and Hectic
If you're already busy with kids, work, or school, the last thing you want to add is another major task. There are so many details to keep track of, and that's just for the wedding day! Then there are countless other details to manage in the months leading up to it, like invitations, bridal showers, bachelorette parties, etc.
Planning a wedding can feel like taking on another full-time job - and one you're not being paid for, to boot! So, it's no wonder people feel too stressed and overwhelmed to deal with all the details, especially if their partner isn't as much help as they would like.
It Doesn't Come Naturally
Some folks just aren't planners by nature – or aren't that interested in it. You may have a good sense of what you want the event to be like, but that's about it. If you're not naturally drawn to planning, it will be more difficult for you to enjoy the process of wedding planning.
It may help to see your lack of natural interest as a normal facet of yourself (like how some people are introverts and others are extroverts). But, on the plus side, it can be empowering to realise that there are things you aren't good at and don't enjoy. And then, if you recognise that, it's ok to ask for help!
You Don't Have Enough Help
Unfortunately, not all couples split up the tasks equally. Sometimes one partner is more interested in wedding planning than the other – and sometimes, one person simply wants to be more involved. Either way, it's a problem if the other partner isn't as willing to help.
If you have a hard time getting your partner on board with helping out, then maybe you should use that as further motivation to find other ways to enjoy the process of wedding planning. Your efforts will pay off when you have a stress-free wedding day!
Remember that you can always ask for help from other people, too – such as your parents and your maid of honour.
It Gives You Anxiety or Stress
It's normal to feel anxious in general about an upcoming life event, but when you add in all the other factors that come with wedding planning, it can produce a lot of stress. The problem is compounded if you don't have much support from your partner or if you're dealing with family members who are too involved (or not involved enough).
You may find the stress and anxiety are compounded by your perfectionism. You want everything to be just right, but it can be hard to get there.
Ideally, you'll learn to relax and enjoy the process of wedding planning as much as possible! And depending on your level of anxiety or stress, you should definitely talk with a therapist, doctor, or counsellor if that's a concern.
It's Not What You Want
There is no such thing as the "perfect wedding." Every couple will have different ideas and visions of their ideal wedding day, and those tastes will evolve over time too.
Sometimes it can be hard to face this reality – especially after you've already made a lot of plans and spent a lot of time and money. Of course, you want to honour the traditions that your family has carried on for generations, but you also want something unique, so it's more special to you personally.
It may help to see planning a wedding as an opportunity for individual expression. Of course, you'll still honour the traditions too, but you can also make the wedding uniquely yours.
There's So Much Involved
You likely have preconceived notions of what planning a wedding will be like, but it's always better to know for sure. Once you get started, you'll realise there are so many decisions to make! There are dozens (if not hundreds) of details involved.
It's easy to feel overwhelmed and exhausted when you try to take on everything. But if you limit your wedding to just the essentials, it will be much more manageable and enjoyable for you.
You don't want guests who are bored or uninterested at your reception! So it helps if those closest to you treat the process as a priority and don't spread themselves too thin.
How to Make Wedding Planning Easier
No matter your reason for hating wedding planning, there are steps you can take to make it easier. And if you can manage to make it enjoyable, even better!
• Start Early: The earlier you get started on the wedding planning process, the more time you’ll have to organise everything. That way, you can take things in small chunks and work through it all at your own pace.
• Start Small: Your wedding is a process, not an event. Instead of worrying about the whole thing at once, just focus on the next step. Ask your partner how they're feeling about planning too – and then do what you both feel most comfortable with right now. You can always take on more tasks as you get more practice and experience with planning. And who knows – maybe your outlook will change over time too!
• Share Tasks Equally with Your Partner: If you're having a hard time getting both of you excited about wedding planning, try to see it as a team effort! That might help motivate each of you to take on your share of the responsibilities. If your partner isn’t as keen on wedding planning as you are, delegate tasks based on their preference. For example, they may be far more excited to start taste-testing caterers or picking the booze, rather than choosing flowers or napkin colours.
• Learn How to Relax: If stress and anxiety are getting in the way, it helps to learn how to relax more. Permit yourself to slow down when needed, practice deep breathing exercises, or spend some time meditating each day. You may also find that taking a few minutes each day to plan your wedding will help you feel more excited and motivated about it. You can even break your plans into three or six-month goals with rewards for completion!
• Take Time Off: The last thing you need is for wedding planning to take over your entire life. Make sure you take evenings and days off from wedding planning each week, so that you have a mental break from all of it. During your time off, you’re banned from talking or even thinking about the wedding! And try to keep everything wedding-related in one designated area of your house, so that you aren’t faced with it everywhere you go.
At the end of the day, your wedding only happens once, so you want to enjoy the process of planning it. From a small intimate gathering to a large formal event, your wedding can be whatever you want it to be. You may wish to consult with a wedding planner if you're having trouble managing the details.
Where Can I Order Wedding Stationery and Accessories?
It's perfectly normal to dislike wedding planning – especially if you're not a huge fan of being organised or working on a project with so many moving parts. But there are several things you can try to make the process easier going forward! Ask for help from your partner and loved ones, learn how to relax if you're anxious/stressed, and do whatever helps you feel most comfortable.
One thing that can help to make the entire process easier is to order all of your wedding stationery and accessories (such as the guest book) at once, through a reputable wedding stationer. At Bride and Groom Direct, we stock everything you’ll need for your big day – from wedding invitations to place cards, table plans, photo booth props and cake cutter sets. We even stock a lovely range of thank you cards so that you can show appreciation to your guests after the big day!
We have over 100 years of experience printing wedding stationery as part of our parent company, CCA occasions. Over the years, we’ve served thousands of happy customers with our beautiful and professionally printed designs. Why not join them today?